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Showing posts from July, 2020

True Story©... The Wrath of the Cicadas

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(yes, y'all have seen this image before)      Don’t call me.   Don’t call me unless someone is dead or fucking bleeding on the way to the upper room. My first several years of reasonably-compensated non-retail employment involved being tethered to a phone and I have learned to hate that shit now, even when that phone is my wireless for most other communication than texts.      June 18 th , day 23 of furlough, my phone rings.   I ignore it from across the room while I play GRID on the PlayStation. …   it rings again.   I holler to my wife in her office in the back “what the FUCK, are you calling me!?”   She is either asleep or ignores me. … it. rings. again.   What the HELL?!!?   I say as I pause the game and head over to the desk to take it off the charger.   It is a weird number, I Google and learn that it is from one of those weird Eastern European countries, like Moldova or Romania or Slavobia or whatever the fuck ever they’re named these days.   Well I ain’t callin

Life Comes at You

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     People from where I am from aren’t supposed to do the shit I am   doing right now. … stick with me here.      A child of a single mother, we grew up in the hood.   Beyond the normal shit of football in the street and ding dong ditch at 2am, time was spent running from racist-ass cops before they became emboldened enough to shoot people that looked like us in the back.   We always had what we needed , but had to learn to grind hard for wants that often never quite panned out for even that, as we all had to grow up fast.   Extra money from cutting yards and handiwork was often remitted back into the household and became food and necessities.      Rarely did we have the luxury of travel.   I had never left North Carolina until right around my 12 th birthday and that trip was to Atlanta to visit an uncle who had been living there my entire life already.   Any and all travel in my childhood involved visiting family and never included a hotel unless my grandfather was aroun

True Story©... Better Traphouses and Bandos

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      Life is fucking hilarious sometimes… Back on 05/20, I was invited into a one on one with my manager and HER manager and informed that I was being furloughed on 05/26 and that it would last until 08/30.      The way things were in play with unemployment eligibility and leave time payout, things were not framed to be as bad as one might have thought they should be.   I ain’t living like that though.   I know two speeds: “control” and “motherfucking panic.”   That said, I was NOT prepared to do anything short of wilding the fuck out.      I finished the week and collected my holiday pay for Memorial Day, then came the panic.   I woke every day at my normal time, made my omelet and sat down to the computer and hopped on the Google machine to see if I could locate the name of someone who could put me in the direction of generating some income doing something I know how to do.   That said, I miraculously found myself with the contact information of a couple of television