The musings of a madman...

  I was off work on Tuesday...      I LITERALLY spent the day on the couch, complaining about the fact that nothing comes on television that interests me in the daytime until I eventually just dozed the hell off. Well, almost literally... I had an appointment in the morning and had to step out into the abusive cold for a couple of hours, but then I was home on the couch bitching about television as I described above...      While teetering between napping and wondering how the hell Pat McAfee can get away with cussing on television at noon, even on cable, I would have SWORN I heard the "chingchingching" sound we've been conditioned to think of when we think of Santa on his sleigh. "I'm trippin, lemme get this little nap in and I got some straightening up to do before anyone gets home" was the first thought in my head and closed my eyes back.      It should be noted that in this house I actually do have a chimney and a fireplace unlike...

       Okay, so I'm chilling in the house on a random-ass Wednesday morning with the Baby Bird™ . It should be noted that "chilling in the house" means I am on the clock, whereas being "at home" would have meant I was on the couch, in my bed or in the garage. Also, Baby Bird™ is my new nickname for my grandlittle as she physically outgrows Tiny Little™ . Anyway, chilling in the house with an infant. The phone rings... Me: "Hello?" Caller: "Hey Phillip, it's Chris." Me: "Whatup Chris? You usually just text!" [ Phlip note : Chris is the guy who bought my old house, he texts me to come grab straggling mail items when they happen to show. The house is right on my daily travels and is only 8 minutes from my new place ] Chris: "Yeah, it's not mail this time. You got a visitor." Me: "A--... visitor? No one even visited me when I LIVED there! It ain't the cops is it?" Chris: "No, he is insistent t...