The musings of a madman...

    I have an odd relationship with TV. We own six and there are shows I enjoy a lot, but the one in the garage exist more as a PC monitor than television, and I still somehow manage to fall asleep on the couch even while watching the shows I DO enjoy.      Despite this, two things remain true... 1 - since I have rediscovered my writing as an adult, I've wanted to write for a television show. and 2 - I've always wanted to be on a game show. I've taken the jeopardy quiz twice but that shit is CONSIDERABLY harder than barking answers at the television every night at 7:30pm Eastern Standard Time.      In a semi-response to #1 above, I shared the contact information of a production executive in the industry back in 2020 when I was furloughed from work for six weeks. I was inexplicably allowed access to throw my ideas at him without being hung up upon, blocked or sent a cease and desist. One might say down through the years that I am entertaining h...

       I don’t know how good y’all are with math but after splitting with my ex-wife someone I had a wedding with once, I became a single man.   Years removed from the old dating game (no pun intended) , I was not prepared for a world wherein “dating apps” were a thing.   I mean, sure I had heard of them in the time I was off the market but the concept of being on one was foreign to me. Foreign or no, they were a new reality that I had to learn to navigate and I gave it a go… … and struck out…      No need to dig into the gory details of things, just know that re-entering that world from where I had been was like someone returning from a prison bid (pun intended) .   You ever seen a dude come home from a few years in prison and not have a fucking clue on what the world had become while he was locked away?   He wants you to run him over to the Cingular store in the mall to get his Palm Treo reactivated and score a few ...

       For all of my discussion of how much I hate talking on the phone, there still remains a precious few people who I will actually call.   Usually it is because I know that person will be in a car and a text conversation will be disjointed as fuck or take longer than the time I have to deal with whatever needs to be discussed.   Or it is more business than can be conveyed via text. Worry not, though…   I can still only be counted on to make one or two calls a week to people I know.   Otherwise, it will be a text message or one of a constant barrage of memes on Facebook between my bouts with the FB filters.      So following last week’s kidnapping fiasco , I simply sat on my couch and spun through mid-afternoon on my lunch break instead of wandering outside back into danger.   Needless to say, I found this painfully boring.   When I get bored, I will either do something incredibly creative or something INCR...

     Y’all remember back in the summer when I was desperate and fishing for anything that could make me some money while I was furloughed? [ link ] What about now?      Okay, so Tuesday I am in the house minding my own damn business on my lunch break, chilling on the couch watching Judge Jerry when I get a Google Duo call from the studio exec whose brain I thought I was picking, but only now realize was giving him a little free entertainment while killing some time of my own. Executive: “Hey buddy, how goes it?” Me: “I’m the one who calls people ‘buddy’ around here.” Executive: “Huh?” Me: “It’s my thing…   MY dogs are buddy,   my nephews are buddy, random kids in stores are buddy, OTHER peoples dogs are budd--…” Executive: “I gotcha.   How’s life?” Me: “As normal as can be expected.” Executive: “So you had some interesting ideas back in the spring, and I--…” Me: “You’re calling to make me a rich man and tel...

      Life is fucking hilarious sometimes… Back on 05/20, I was invited into a one on one with my manager and HER manager and informed that I was being furloughed on 05/26 and that it would last until 08/30.      The way things were in play with unemployment eligibility and leave time payout, things were not framed to be as bad as one might have thought they should be.   I ain’t living like that though.   I know two speeds: “control” and “motherfucking panic.”   That said, I was NOT prepared to do anything short of wilding the fuck out.      I finished the week and collected my holiday pay for Memorial Day, then came the panic.   I woke every day at my normal time, made my omelet and sat down to the computer and hopped on the Google machine to see if I could locate the name of someone who could put me in the direction of generating some income doing something I know how to do.   That said...