Showing posts with the label the handoff

True Story©… A (Tree) House of Cards

    I’m a bit of what’s called an autodidact.  If you don’t know what that is, it means that I am a self-taught person.  I have my hands in a lot of things that I am quite good at; lawn care, basic car maintenance, minor household repairs – handyman shit – as well as building things and of course writing.  If it can be done with basic hand tools, I am him.  If it requires more than that, I can probably figure it out. One could say it is because I am too cheap to pay someone for some shit I can do myself, unless of course it is for convenience or I don’t have time. Y’all remember when I built my fire pit?  No blueprint, no drawings, just natural ability and a little bit of time. What about now?  [ link ] On the heels of that I of course showed it off here and OF COURSE on various social media in the 15ish months since, especially over the last 3-4ish months when I have had more weather-permitting time to light it up.  What I have not told you, though, is that I have been tasked with

True Story©… A Very Merry Woodpenis Christmas

       “Frenemies” If you have ever watched Justified on FX as I did when I binged all six seasons and the whole of the spinoff a few months ago, you know what that is.   As you may or not be aware, I have made a bit of one of those in our own local law enforcement here lately.   I promise shit didn’t start out that way, but a strange series of mishaps made that bed for me.      I recently gained the knowledge that he may be finally cutting me loose in order to move on a little further.   Part of me is glad to have him out of my ass – pun intended – but part of me will miss having a local law man who owes me favors so big that he has to honor requests or perhaps have a conversation with Internal Affairs. It all started last month with a phone call… Me: “You know if you keep this up, we are gonna have to sit down and discuss our thing with my wife.” Woodpenis: “Well if things go to plan, we might not need to have that conversation.” Me: “Well Detective Woodpenis, what are yo