Showing posts from May, 2023

True Story©… A Street of Bourbon

       When I was a kid I only travelled outside of my home state a VERY few times, and never outside of the time zone I was born in until I was an actual adult.   Never set foot on a plane until I was 20.   Everywhere we went was driveable distances.   It became such a “thing” that even in adulthood, I will sooner drive out trips that many people will fly. Kid me, having only been to Williamsburg and the beach in VA, then Atlanta after that – outside of visits to grandma’s family down in the sticks in SC – used to think that the lines one saw on a map would be visible out in the world as you travel.   Like there would be a white line marking the exit of one state and into the next.      Adult me, as soon as the constraints of being a broke child were off, got the fuck out and around the country even if to be inconvenienced by the habit of driving instead of even CONSIDERING flying.      One such trip transpired and the young age of 21… I rented a car because I was driving an abs

True Story©… Vengeance is Mine!

       Man, I promised Santa Claus …      Is there anything more infuriating than being quite clear and succinct with someone, only to have them continue to respond to what they had in their minds that you would say and not what you actually did?      We closed on and moved into this house on October 20 rd and 23 th in 2021 respectively.  The in-between days involved some fuckery on the part of the seller’s agent that I will not rehash at this point.  As a good most of you know, 2021 was a WILD time in real estate in the middle of the Covid era and I happened to get lucky in making more than I expected on my old house and spending less than expected on the new one. One element of the above-mentioned agent is how she didn’t fully do her follow-through when it related to removing the damned listing when it closed.      Again, 2021 Covid-Era real estate had large companies cold calling home owners and making cash offers for slightly less – and then INCREDIBLY more – than they may g

True Story©… The Cure for Coulrophobia

  It is verifiable that I tend to mean well, even when the outcomes end up being quite fucky. Did y’all know that one in ten adults and ten in every thousand children – mostly girls – are afraid of clowns?   In my life, I have known two people who fell into one of those numbers.   One of said people is someone I speak to regularly and the other one that I have legitimately not seen or heard from in over 25 years.   It is quite possible she is in prison for de-lifing a clown.   Whatever.      In the challenge of people who are afraid of clowns existing, I saw an opportunity.   No, this would not be an opportunity to turn a profit on some kind of snake oil sales scheme.   Matter fact, I’mma do this with my own name and not Moe, because I want some of the damn accolades sometimes.   This is a chance to be a real hero, help some people out if you will.      I placed ads on Craigslist and BookFace local group explaining that I would be offering a service giving people who fear clowns

True Story©… Prestidigitation

       Wife Person™ is still upset with Mr. Ssippi… Not for anything he himself did, so much as how he was not the voice of reason when we decided to try our hand at making movies, which I would find after the fact that she was not exactly a fan of.   Since I live in this constant need for her to like or at least be cool with the friends I speak to on the most regularest of basis, I set out to salvage the relationship.      Not long after we got back from GA in March, Ssip sent me a text that he would be passing through on 85 on his way to Virginia and would gladly make Greensboro his stopover point since his employer was footing the bill.   While in town, we could link up and enjoy a meal or something.   Unfortunately, Mrs. Ssippi would be home with Giant Nephew™ and Dante the puppydog and thus unable to join the fun.   The day he was to come in coincided with one whereupon I had an afternoon appointment so I would be free of work considerably earlier than normal. Wife Person: