Posts

Showing posts with the label don't call me

True Story©… Vengeance is Mine!

Image
       Man, I promised Santa Claus …      Is there anything more infuriating than being quite clear and succinct with someone, only to have them continue to respond to what they had in their minds that you would say and not what you actually did?      We closed on and moved into this house on October 20 rd and 23 th in 2021 respectively.  The in-between days involved some fuckery on the part of the seller’s agent that I will not rehash at this point.  As a good most of you know, 2021 was a WILD time in real estate in the middle of the Covid era and I happened to get lucky in making more than I expected on my old house and spending less than expected on the new one. One element of the above-mentioned agent is how she didn’t fully do her follow-through when it related to removing the damned listing when it closed.      Again, 2021 Covid-Era real estate had large companies cold calling home owners and making cash offers for slightly less – and then INCREDIBLY more – than they may g

True Story©… Serial Entrepreneurship

Image
       It’s rare that I just get to be “me” anymore.   My life is pretty mundane to be honest.   Work, clean, daddy/husband, sobriety…   Rinse/repeat.   I find myself in need of an outlet, sometimes to the point where I seek mischief to entertain myself.   Not unlike a puppy learning to test your limits.      Sometimes the “mischief” finds me.   Sometimes even still, the mischief finds me from prior shit.   We’ll call that the wheel of mischief .      Moe fuckin’ Phillips…   That guy will be the death of me one of these days. I’m minding my business on my couch on lunch three weeks ago and “Moe’s” burner phone rings… [ Phlip note : I dunno WHY the hell I keep that thing ] Me: “Hello?” Caller: “Is this Moe?” Me: “Indeed it is” Caller: “I got your number from a friend of mine who says you have given sage business advice--…” Me: “I wouldn’t call the advice ‘sage’ so much as ‘damn near criminal’ but continue?” Caller: “Well I’m in a bit of a pickle and need--….” Me: “L

True Story©… The Book That Never Ends

Image
  (not to be confused with the SONG that never ends...)      Funny thing, this whole living a life chronicled in True Story©… [ Phlip note : there’s the thing, already! ] You’re told in school to take notes knowing that the information covered and ostensibly noted will come up when it is time for a knowledge check.   Similarly, typing out the exploits here to be followed by interested onlookers allows anyone reading to look back and realize that this comes off as not a collection of stories, but an infinitely expanding connected singular one.      Chronicling the exploits in detail also lays immediately bare the “dammit, this again” feeling when some shit I dealt with before decides to fall back into my life. Something I should have learned about supervillainy watching superhero cartoons for the last 89% of my life is that villainy, as karma is concerned, is NEVER ending.   You can do dirt, but that also means you will have a rough go of getting away from said dirt.      I can

True Story©… Nauga Advocacy and Awareness

Image
  (yes, this is what a Nauga looks like)  Image Credit: Somewhere on the Googles      Part of the act of being a newly-decent, no-longer-a-supervillain human being includes advocacy for those with less than myself.   I’ll slide a couple bucks to an unhoused person, canned goods to food drives; even Shaggy Thunder was an SPCA-adopted puppy. Say hi, little buddy. (note: this is an old picture...  he's much fatter now)      … so yeah…   One of my soft spots is for dogs in particular but for animals in general.   I kind of RAGE at the very thought of people abusing/abandoning puppies, yet the BookFace algorithm and my apparent obsession puppy videos serves it that I see such shit daily in suggested Reels. In the interest of not triggering myself, we will not go any further into the whole animal abuse thing.      Week before last, though, while I was scrolling on The Bookface™ , and one of those sad puppy rescues came up.   It was heart-wrenching.   An emaciated mother dog doing the

True Story©… Anonymity

Image
       I’m good at things… As vague as that may sound, I say it like that to say that no matter how good I may so happen to be at a bunch of things out in the real world, I hate – HATE – for my horn to be publicly tooted over it.   That goes for work, home, anywhere really.   That may seem counterproductive come review time at work, but my manager is well aware of this about me and we have a few aliases I jokingly use when I get to work and kill shit. That’s professionally; as in the shit that pays the bills.   Not having people going around talking about me in a manner that would have onlookers look for a chance to pile more of their shit on me is the name of the game.   Personally, it is totally different but basically the same.   When I clock out and come back across this living room, the last thing I want is for someone to make assumptions with my time because some third party informed me I was capable.   There is a space of comfort in being able to remain nondescript.   Being

True Story©… Time to Valen

Image
       Life is funny… Everyone – including my own wife – knows I could give a dry fuck about Valentine’s Day.   Not even to bore you to tears with the norm of ultra-wokeness about pagan holidays, not needing one day out the year to show love or whatever else people sell themselves as “reasons” to not be into it.   I mean, I don’t mind going out to dinner or to whatever level of the world outside of my house that is open during these cold cold Rona days.   I just don’t like the concept of having to deal with crowds and people to do so, and that has been the case since long before Rona made it cool to assault people for getting too fucking close to you.      After my previous attempt to offer dating advice, then documenting it , I would think that no one would contact me for shit on the subject ever again. I mean that would make for a reasonable populace, no?   Well if anything about the past 11 months and especially the last three have taught us, it is that there is no such a damn

True Story©… Out of Office

Image
     I don’t know if y’all noticed, but I been away since Christmas Eve.  Consistent output every Thursday morning at 7:30am with the exception of a reset week I took in October. One could assign my disappearance to it being SATURDAY before I noticed that last Thursday was Thursday.  That would be too easy an explanation though.      In fact, that would be too convenient an explanation in a world where the randomest of shit happens to me every few damned days or so. …  so it is the Sunday after Christmas.  I dropped my daughter off with her mother for the week.  I get a phone call, and y’all know I hate those with the burning passion that Mitch McConnell has for poor people. Me: “Uhh…  Hello?” Caller: “Gat-DAYUM, n**ga, don’t act so surprised to hear from me!” Me: “It’s just that your calls usually precede an adventure.” Marlon: “I know man, I’m legit sorry for that.” Me: “Wait, what was that?” Marlon: “What was what?” Me: “What did you just say.” Marlon: “C’mon, m