Showing posts with the label life and death

True Story©... A Million First Dates

     There are always times that people can be tested.  Apparently being a people watcher and all-around curmudgeon all of these years has made me pretty good at testing people for their commitment to what is important to me. Sure, there was the one time I messed that up, but we all slip here and there and it is best that we simply learn from it and get on with our lives. Anyway…      You know what is worse than a first date in general?  A BAD first date?  For every first date that ends in surprise sex that you didn’t have to ASK her for will be the one who has printed a list of terroristic demands that she has come up with with the assistance of her miserable friends who want to make sure she stays miserable with them. For every lunch date that turns into 3 hours chilling in the park, there is the one who complains about the restaurant and every other little thing she can come up to in her short-sighted-ass conversation. These are the ones you can’t WAIT to end. But wh

A (real) Celebration of Life

Wait until a random Thursday and call your next of kin… “[next of kin], I died in my sleep last night.  It is on you to plan this funeral.” Hold on a minute, I know that seems morose as fuck, but I am going somewhere with this.      When we’re at funerals, they tell us not to be sad because it is over, but to smile because it happened.  To celebrate the life of the loved one that you now have to bury and not to lament overt the loss.  What better way to celebrate a life than to do it while the person is still around and sentient to the love they’re receiving?      Lady and gentleman, I present to you…  The living funeral.  It is not a concept I came up with, it is one I kind of read about daydreaming for this post. The takeaway, though is let me have my flowers while I can still smell ‘em. In my family, the day of a death, the phone calls are made post-haste with mind on getting the body into the ground as quickly as possible.  So if you make that call on Thursd