The musings of a madman...

       The changing weather and the near-constant presence of a Tiny Little™ in my house have pressed me into an extreme level of home body life. I'd say I'm bothered by it, but I'm really only beckoned from my house if it involves food or a leaf mulching job these last couple weeks.      Unfortunately, this means that people come to my door and I am actually home to have to -- or try to -- ignore them. So this past Saturday, I finished the one lawn on my schedule for the day and unloaded my truck, then sat down at the computer in the corner of my garage to work on the YouTube video I had recorded for it. [ link ] As I'm working on the voiceover and PRAYING nothing noisy happens outside my driveway to spoil it, my "should have closed the fuckin door" was confirmed when someone walked up to but not in my garage. Him: "Excuse me, are you busy?" Me: "Yes, and now I gotta record this voiceover for a third time..." Him: "I apologize, it...

  (look ma, new AI generator!)      Early last year, I came up with the harebrained scheme to travel back to pre-Rhodesia southern Africa – around present-day Zimbabwe – and slit Cecil Rhodes’ throat before he got a chance to ruin the continent… Read about it above if you don’t recall how that went over (surprise - NOT well!)      Anyway… Y’all know if you read last January or just now that I took EXTRA special care to not put myself in position to get anyone pregnant while I was there. This will matter more shortly. It’s spring, y’all! That means I get to go outside-outside and exercise instead of spending countless hours on my exercise bike. Furthermore, I get to take the dogs with me sometimes. So there it is, last weekend while my mom was out of town, I was tasked with caring for her dog. As a boxer, this dog has a BARREL full of energy that needs to be gotten out. In so much, I geared up for a walk and went to take Luna for a stroll thro...

       I was in Vietnam. No, seriously, I was IN Vietnam!   Read about it here and here , then come back and we will continue…        Welcome back.      The funniest of shit has happened since I have been home during this whole Rona situation… I sit and watch Maury every morning at 11 and then again every afternoon at 5, just to make sure people are still living more shittily than I am.      One day a couple of weeks ago, just as it was going off and my lunch break was beginning, my wife was away at a meeting at her school.   I threw on some shoes and set out to grab some Jamaican food for lunch, a Lyft stops in front of my house and blocks my departure. I hop out of the car prepared to throw hands in the street, and a guy jumps out of the car and yells “FATHER!!!”      Now, a perhaps few of you know that I spent some of my 20s doing some bald-head-hoe shi...