The musings of a madman...

       With the lawn season winding to a close for the year, I'm having to turn to other things to pass my time. As I explained last month, clearing my Moe Phillips email box of unread messages was entertaining enough, but as a "do it to death" personality, I was finished in no time so here I am, back bored as it gets and a LONG ways to spring.      Nearing the end of my rope and close to my idle hands becoming the devil's playground, I received a phone call on the burner line... Me: "hello?" Her: "is this Moe?" Me: "uhh..." Her: "Moe Phillips? Do I have the right number?" Me: "Yeah, it's me. Who's this?" Her: "You don't know me but you know my father" Me: "Do I?" Her: "Yes, you helped him when he reached out to you last year." Me: "mmhmm" Her: "He is a preacher and he asked you about--..." Me: "... about how to grow his ministry to be able to expand...

  It is verifiable that I tend to mean well, even when the outcomes end up being quite fucky. Did y’all know that one in ten adults and ten in every thousand children – mostly girls – are afraid of clowns?   In my life, I have known two people who fell into one of those numbers.   One of said people is someone I speak to regularly and the other one that I have legitimately not seen or heard from in over 25 years.   It is quite possible she is in prison for de-lifing a clown.   Whatever.      In the challenge of people who are afraid of clowns existing, I saw an opportunity.   No, this would not be an opportunity to turn a profit on some kind of snake oil sales scheme.   Matter fact, I’mma do this with my own name and not Moe, because I want some of the damn accolades sometimes.   This is a chance to be a real hero, help some people out if you will.      I placed ads on Craigslist and BookFace local gr...