The musings of a madman...

       I'm a serial DIY'er... I'm bullshitting, we grew up less-than-rich and I'm a cheap ass who cannot fathom paying someone to do something I can realistically do myself.      Of late, say the last month or so, I've become more aggressive in my research and effort into lawn care. Wild timing to do this at the end of the seson, but I digress. I bought a used pickup truck on October 9th and went right to the work of it paying for itself that very weekend, carrying around my lawn equipment for quick load/unload to get the yards that pay me done as efficiently as possible. This ain't about that though...      When back home over the past now three weeks, I've transitioned from "work" mode to "plan to work" mode. The planning part includes questions to myself on how to do this whole thing better; how to make the yards greener, how to prevent weeds and how as a DIY'er to do all that shit without breaking the bank. Basically, doing ...

       “Frenemies” If you have ever watched Justified on FX as I did when I binged all six seasons and the whole of the spinoff a few months ago, you know what that is.   As you may or not be aware, I have made a bit of one of those in our own local law enforcement here lately.   I promise shit didn’t start out that way, but a strange series of mishaps made that bed for me.      I recently gained the knowledge that he may be finally cutting me loose in order to move on a little further.   Part of me is glad to have him out of my ass – pun intended – but part of me will miss having a local law man who owes me favors so big that he has to honor requests or perhaps have a conversation with Internal Affairs. It all started last month with a phone call… Me: “You know if you keep this up, we are gonna have to sit down and discuss our thing with my wife.” Woodpenis: “Well if things go to plan, we might not need to have that ...

     I could be making better use of my time and abilities here… In the months since I unsuccessfully robbed Santa Claus , I have exhibited the skills of a man who could sell commodities to market and internationally, courier goods across state lines, negotiate hostage situations and most importantly make a TON of fucking money. It’s August now.  I been at this for 8 months, one client paying enough for all year every three months and I will see them in a couple of weeks.  His buddy has ramped up his ticket sales to the point where he needs me every three as well instead of the original six.  Between those, I am clearing $575k every 12 weeks.  I am pulling another $25k every month.  Throw in the as-negotiated HUGE money deal I am taking from that little European country that I cannot name at this point and I am looking at about $5mil cash on hand, even after paying off my house and revolving credit. At this point, my lady still refus...