Showing posts with the label give thanks

Writing About Writing Vol. 18... A True Story about "True Story©"

  This was all one big happy-ass accident… On a random Thursday (September 1 nd ) in 2016, at 7:30am, I logged onto The BookFace and made a silly little status about God-knows-what.  I started it with the term True Story©… Doing so forced people’s eyes onto the status, then only a few dozen words long to have them get all the way through the story to realize I was ABSOLUTELY bullshitting.  It was such a hit at the time, with the comment thread lasting for days, that I decided on the next Thursday to do it again.  Rinse, repeat and so on and so-forth.  With practice, the statuses got longer and longer – perhaps at the danger of being too long for social media.   Now y’all know why I am procedurally MARRIED to Thursday morning at 7:30am. After a few weeks of this, I remembered that I do have and had since neglected a blog that I could be using for this… Say Less™…   Natural next step was to UN-neglect the blog.  I could come on back home and make use of all the space I wanted withou

True Story©... Horrible Advice, continued

I am beginning to think that True Story© is beginning to ruin my fucking life… Chilling at work on Monday, minding my own business, I gets an email: Fuck My Existence Well I guess it stands to reason that I have BAKED this damn cake, so it is totally on me to frost the sumbitch. We shot some back-and-forth around and he was clear that he was not willing to approach ANY of the holidays with this woman, that he had taken Wednesday off and that would be when he wanted to complete this whole thing.      Well shit on me, I guess I got no time for setup. After work Tuesday, I sat down at the computer and planned and plotted and daydreamed just how I could bail this man out of a VERY shitty situation. At least the kid was not hers and would not have a lot invested in them breaking up.  I mean, it only makes sense that a kid – especially a boy child – is not going to be there for someone disrespecting his father when that father is actually present , no?  


     Sometimes it just isn’t worth it to continually shit in someone’s cornflakes. Rather than take the wind out of the sails that is the conquerors’ favorite holidays, we will take just a few minutes of your time to say what WE are thankful for. -    We’re thankful that white people have not managed to fuck up Chadwick Boseman . -    We’re thankful for President Barack Obama… … no, stay with us here.  The saying is that a presidency isn’t a presidency until the elected individual has ONE legislative victory.  And in playing by those rules, the last previous president who DID have any remains president.  -    We’re thankful for our wives… and our other wives … …  and our OTHER wives -    We’re thankful for Robert Sylvester Kelly -    We’re thankful for then enlightenment that will allow Hollyweird to burn to the fuckingground . -    We’re thankful for Colin Kaepernick… … we’re still cautiously wary of his lightskinndedness, though See?  How hard was