Showing posts from 2023

True Story©… Am-Knees-Ya

       I have not changed the address on my license since 2008, when we moved down from the far end of the county back into the city.   I have thought about it, but the need for Real ID requires that I set foot inside the DMV to do it.   Furthermore, my (retired) mom still lives at the address that is on my license so the emergency situations that might arise from someone showing up to that address are not hindered by the fact that I have not lived there since July of 2009. Besides, I am there at least three days a week or so anyway in case any mail comes.      Recently, my simply not making the change worked to my advantage… As a few of you know, I am in what is among the best physical shape I have been in in my adult life.   Back before election time, I had taken up hitting open gym and playing basketball with some people young enough to be my kids.   Stylistic difference in how they play against how we grew up playing aside, everything went quite well and except for a cramp that

True Story©… The Big (little) Getback

       Y’know?   Sometimes I have the toughest of times getting out of my own damned way.   I should say, I guess, that my own way finds a way of staying in front of me.   Every time I think I have dispatched of a former situation, something directly related to it finds its way back into my life.      As the two of you may recall, I once tried to make a movie and the whole thing literally and figuratively went up in flames.   I escaped the situation – again literally and figuratively – unburned until I was revisited by it a couple of years down the road. My handling of it all seemed to me that I had rid myself of it to the point where I could go on with my life.   New house, new puppy, new outlook and all.   Everything is good right? RIGHT?!!? Wrong™!      [ Phlip note : unless you received a DM from me on Instagram at/about 4pm on November 12 rd , please click the link below before continuing ] [ link ]      Now just why in the great blue hell would I be yammering on ab

True Story©... Prison Outreach

       I’ll be honest, life has been difficult and assuredly less fun since having to abandon the Moe Phillips name… Imagine YEARS of using a contrived identity with which to complete the tasks of various entertaining endeavors, legality bedamned, and just having to throw them all out the window because of a detective with a funny name .      As we recall, I previously had set about the task of rehabilitating the Moe Phillips name by using him as a vigilante to exact justice for those who could not extract it in legal manners.   The issue, apparently, is that vigilante justice is still a crime in itself. [ Phlip note : then how the fuck is Batman not arrested?   I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA, PEOPLE!!! ]      Short on options to allow me to continue to use the Moe Phillips name and all the street cred I have earned it through the last few years without Detective Woodpenis up my ass – no pun intended – I’mma have to smarten up for a while. Planning for long vacation and needing t

True Story©… My Life in (Bad) Timing

  … and we’re back!        It should be noted that I spend roughly a third of my time alone with my dogs.  Wife Person™ leaves for work at 7am, and twenty minutes later I take Ava to my mom to drop off at school, from which she will also be the one to pick her up.  I am out and back before I clock in by 8am.  I am in the house by myself until Wife Person™ returns at about 4.  Carve out the eighty minutes I spend exercising before waking them and I’m alone with the boys 11.5 hours a day five days a week and there went 57.5 of 168 hours.      It is further noteworthy that middle-child-by-birth-order life has already instilled me with the social awkwardness that allows one to become their own favorite company.  I say that to say that social cues have and likely will never be my thing, and that working from home will prove to have done nothing to fix this. Anyway…      Despite my normal isolation and my absolute comfort with it, so long as there is music, a podcast or some combination of

True Story©… Wrist Twistin’ Kitchen

       Sometimes my boredom takes me to WILD places… Y’all remember back in 2020, when I got furloughed from work and snared the information of and finagled some time on the phone with a TV exec? [ link ] What about now?      Well I am not saying all of that to say that I have been furloughed again.   I have actually made a pretty good go of life since that furlough ended 7 weeks early, but no need to get all off into that.   I have, from time to time, called or received calls from the same guy about ideas he or I might have for television shows.   I swear, I think I am just his release to break up the monotony of his daily life because there is no way in hell he can be taking the shit I come up with seriously.      Anyway… A couple of weeks ago, my FB memories dragged me back to an idea I had posted on Twitter (I ain’t calling that shit ‘X,’ like ever) wherein I proposed a new game show idea…   Rather than sit here and explain in excruciating detail what the game and show w

True Story©… ‘Tis the Season

       I am beginning to feel like I am running low on options… My face is known in the community after my previous attempt at shaking things up using people’s short-sightedness for details. Detective Woodpenis is onto me and I can’t use the Moe Phillips name as a shield for criminal enterprise, lest he will perk up and show his face back at my house. I need something new to do,   here y’all!      For those among us who don’t follow me on The BookFace, you’re aware that I have re-created myself as a fitness douche of sorts sharing details of my workouts every weekday.   It started last summer in the form of my walks on my lunch break.   This summer, I have upped the game with longer walks and doing them at 5am while still throwing in a lunchtime one as well. This matters to the presentation due to where I live and what kind of people are outside between 5 and 7 in the morning.   There are people getting on and off of the bus going to first shift jobs or coming home from thir