Showing posts with the label the important takeaway will be that I have learned NOTHING from this

True Story©… Get In The Van!

       I know I say this a lot here lately, but…   Humble brag: I am in what is among the best shape of my adult life.   This will matter to this story in just a moment.      As it got colder, I retreated my workouts into the garage on the cycle, then eventually to spreading it out over the course of the days, usually in 15-minute increments between tasks at work right here in the office.   Last week it was unseasonably warm, so I decided to gear up and hit the road a bit for my walk/run intervals as I did over the summer at 5:15 in the morning. Having lost over 60 pounds, I am still not a “small” person at 5’8” and a recently-more-muscled 210ish pounds these days, people tend to not bother me.   Perhaps it is the big headphones I wear while I am out, but people nod at me or throw a peace sign and keep moving. …   I’m rambling…      So it is last Tuesday…   I am out and on the road, two and a half miles in, elbows deep into the podcast I am listening to when a car – a van actual

True Story©… Am-Knees-Ya pt. II - The Finale

  … and we’re back! if you weren’t here or don’t recall what transpired last week, please click here before continuing or this won’t end up making much sense to you.      So the doctor comes sprinting down the ward and into the room, breathlessly asking the nurse what was awry. Nurse: “The mescaline worked, but I don’t think it worked- worked" Doctor: “W-what do you mean?” Nurse: “Well…   As per norm, he was ‘up high’ for several hours and we expected that, and there were no traumas in his coming down.” Doctor: “Okay, so what’s the problem?” Me: “Y’all hursh!   I need to get some rest before my 12-hour shift on the factory floor tonight!” Nurse: “Well…   That.” Doctor: “What’s happening?” Nurse: “It seems he is of the opinion that he is--…” Me: “Sweetheart! S’cuse me, sweetheart!   Could you have that colored gal that was in here before bring me a whiskey and a cigarette?” Doctor: “Oh shit.” Me: “And when am I getting moved to the Whites hospital?” Nurs