Conversations with Dog
No one ever taught me to pray. I know a whole life of hearing other people do it and it always felt so… rehearsed. The frustratingly long altar prayers in every Sunday service. Grandma squeezing the color out of your hand for fidgeting during the altar call. Standing by famished when that one uncle everyone only sees twice a year "performs" grace over Thanksgiving dinner. "Lawd Jesus, take me with you!" at a funeral. None of it felt quite standard. I know I was always told “come as you are,” and I totally took that to mean that God as I understood him would meet me where I could understand him. So sure, we know The Lord’s Prayer, repeat mitzvahs, we know standard graces over meals and we’re advised to pray regularly, but my question has always been “how?” Get slapped enough for unintended-but-perceived disrespect just for asking that question as a child and the adult in you just doesn’t ask anymore even if the question never goes away.