Explanation of the title will come at the end...

Do you know a compulsive liar?

I mean, just plain pathological with it… Everything that is done is played up to be something just a bit more.

He has one chick tell him that she likes his car, it becomes “I drive that car because it gets me ass regularly.”
He becomes a slave nerd to any one trend of the moment, and in conversation he is a lifelong connoisseur (and yes, I spelled that right) and tastemaker on it.

The one thing a pathological liar has going for them is that they are at best too oblivious or at worst too stupid to be concerned that the people he is telling the lies to were THERE when what he is lying about took place and know the truth.

A lot like Rick Ross (whatup, Joe!)

Which brings me to a situation from this past weekend…
Some friends went to see Tariq Nasheed speak in Charlotte. To those who don’t know who he is, I suggest you click his name and acquaint yourselves with what he is about and come back to finish this.
Anyway, at the end of his seminars, he takes questions and ONE person in the group decided that it would be a good idea to play himself up to someone who has no reason to be impressed with his shit, in front of a group of people with equal entitlement to not giving a fuck.
Despite the fact that the people who came with him knew full better, he goes in to question what to do with “all the women who always hit on me at work,” of course coming after a stammering setup involving items that women really don’t find attractive, I promise you. The three people he was with knew better, those in the audience, ALL of whom loosed pained groans at the question knew better, but I am willing to bet that as he stuttered through his ill-planned-despite-10-minutes-in-line question sounded to HIM like he was saying…

“I have a question!
‘Riq, my problem is twofold…
I happen to be the flyest cat in my county, let alone my call center job. I happen to be heavily into Japanese culture – you know, Anime, Drifting and all – and will eventually move there one day. Anyway, being that women find all things Japanese sexy as it gets and as fly as I am, the baddest bish in the building at my call center job quickly got at me. As usual with EVERY woman to look at me, the deal was sealed quickly.
Well, you know how bishes do when you sling that good dick, she goes back to work on her day off and sends a floorwide email to all the women in the building. Well, when I get back to work in my Japanese drifting car, all the women are calling me the light-skinnded Lex Steele. So there you have it.
My questions are…

1. How do I reel in some of this dick to keep these broads from getting so sprung off me?

2. and...
What can I do to beat some of these bishes off, I mean ain’t but 24 hours in the day and I can’t fit three 4-hour sessions with these hoes, make sure my drifting is practiced and still work and get the necessary sleep I need.

Thanks in advance”

A good friend of mine calls this intersection, at the moment where someone is so committed to a lie that they believe and fight for it as the “my bullshit is poetic” moment.
Usually people who are adept at holding character like that make great professional wrestlers, never breaking character even in public.

The “Hollywood” reference of the title is to the people who get out to the land of fake titties and decide to embellish their resumes in order to gain favor in the light of fake people. When such an approach is taken when there is usually nothing to gain – even if there is A LOT to lose – they’re described as ‘talking Hollywood’.
In the real world, though, these people are generally hard to be around.


Popular posts from this blog

True Story©... Return of the Moose

"Mike Jordan of Rap"