The internets is making me hate my car...

Look, I know it is not some top-end Italian hypercar with an unpronouncable name, but it is what I chose to own and will continue to at that...

no I was not cinderblocked, my wheels are black

Not that anything is wrong with my car, but I am getting kinda tired of it...

  • Stiff ride, loud as fuck exhaust and all the creaks and groans that come in a 21 year-old sporty coupe.

  • "Dude, you should sell me your car!" or "man, do you drift that thing?" every single fucking time I go to the mall between the months of March and October and fall to eyeshot of the first available 16-24 year-old...

  • 100º NC Summers with no Air Conditioning…

  • Squirrelly ride in the rain, even with great tires…

  • Fuggin TREACHEROUS ride in icy conditions, to the point where I have laid out of work so as to actually live to tell about it…

  • Little ticky-tack shit like Idle Air Control Valve causing a funny idle and dropping another fuel injector what seems like every 6 months…

I am beginning to think the love affair is coming to an end, and I will begin serious designs on getting myself a daily, then drive this thing like once or twice a month. I am most seriously considering a Subaru or something with AWD, perhaps a wagon for the family/cargo space and such.
No, this does NOT mean that I will EVER sell my coupe, I would rather it rot out of drivability sitting on my driveway than to CONSIDER loosing it to some fuck who would make a “missile” out of it or otherwise fuck it up. It would at least remain a relic to times where people could lightly modify a car and be wholly conservative about it.

At the still-young age of 31, I am purely capable of continuing with a generally reliable car. As a great many of the two of you know, I volunteer (as in I work without pay) as a moderator on a Web Forum dedicated to the above-imaged automobile. The think-tank has been a constantly valuable source of information and materials for the upkeep/modification of my car, but the popularity of the car has grown because of sites such as, which is making the ownership of the car in general a bit of a bother.
Motherfucking fanbois...
I would like to be able to go out in public without being accosted about what I have done/planned to do with my car. I am not the dick who needs to be center of attention, sometimes I just want to go in the mall and get a pair of sneakers without talking to ANYONE but the person collecting commission for getting my Size 10.5 Nike Airs off of a shelf.

  • I don't care that you've been/plan to/desire to go to Japan.
  • I don't have a car to sell you
  • No one I know has one to sell you
  • I don't have any parts to sell you
  • It would take an obscene amount of money -- as in many many times the value of my car -- for you to wrest it from my possession
  • You can not have my phone number or email address
Matter of fact...

Fuck you.
Fuck the plane you flew in on.
Fuck them shoes.
Fuck yo socks with the bell on it.
Fuck your gay ass Harry Potter accent.
Fuck them cheap ass cigars.
Fuck your Yuckmouth teeth.
Fuck your Hairpiece.
Fuck yo Chocolate.
Fuck Guy Ritchie
Fuck Prince William.
Fuck the Queen.

This is America, my president is black and my lambo is blue n**ga.

Now get the fuck out my face room, and if I see you in the street I'm slappin the shit out of you.

Yes, the behaviors born of a boom on the internet has turned my tastes purely against something that I was sure I would love and nurture for a long time, but instead now I only plan to keep to enjoy sparingly and to spite those who would sell a testicle on ebay to own one with the known history that mine has.
Tough break, this one is not leaving me, period.


Mel/Exitspeed said…

Seriously I drove my hatch in WI winters for 4 years with All-Season tires that also double as auto-X tires. And you know what they say about All-Season tires, they aren't good for any season.

I get what you are saying though. I've battled with getting another 240 over and over again. I've wanted a wagon for a long time, and AWD sure would be nice in my climate. A Legacy Wagon GT 5 Speed just seems like such a perfect choice.

Fuck, just rambling, but I hear ya.
Wayne Edwards said…
I'm just going to say unless you have an sr20 you have absolutely NO REASON AT FUCKING ALL to not have A/C.

I had A/C with my KA and I really miss it on days like today.

But it beats a car payment ANY day of the week.

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