True Story©... The SECOND Time DARE Ruined my Life

True Story©…

                Did I ever tell y’all about the time I got an assault charge?  Worry not, you’re about to read about it now.
Back when I had my previous car, I refrained from putting a sound system in it because I ONLY bought the car as a soulless appliance and not to necessarily enjoy.  That said, I spent a lot of time listening to (and learning to fucking HATE) commercial radio all over again after 15 years without it.  I heard a spot one day where they were doing acting casting calls at a convention center here in town on a day I had previously taken as a Mental Health™ day from work.  Basically, they would interview random folks to see if they could be placed with agencies, no experience needed, all comers would be spoken to between the hours of 10am and 4pm.  With nothing to do that day, I got my hair cut clean and brushed my waves up nicely, groomed the beard and put on some good clothes and headed over.

                When I arrived, the line was BEASTLY!  I mean wrapped around the building.  It was a fall day, so not too hot outside, I had nothing better to do and decided to give it a shot.
I get in the line and put my headphones on, just kinda head bobbing and mouthing along to the music, I look up and see the dude in line next to me and think “damn, this cat looks familiar” at the first glance.  I spend the next 30 minutes racking my brain trying to place where I know this guy from.  What I didn’t realize at the time was that I might have been staring at every chance to try and place where I knew him from.  About the 4th or 5th time he looked around, he asks “can I help you?” and that is the moment that the exchange that would change my life again began…

                Me: “nah, it just feels like I know you from somewhere.”
                Him: “Oh, well I ain’t from around here, so it wouldn’t be from anywhere local I don’t think.”
                Me: “Aight, just kinda feels like I have seen you somewhere or another.”
                Him: “Oh…”
                Me: “Probably would have been a long time ago, like when I was in middle school about 20 years ago now.”
                Him: “Beats me, my man.”
                Me: “Yeah, now this shit is starting to kill me.”
                Him: “Sorry.”
                Me: “Not your fault, homie.”
                Him: “Yeah, and if you were in middle school 20 years ago, I am a bit older than you.”
                Me: “Heh, yeah…  Who wasn’t, it seems.”
                Him: “Back then, I was--…”
                Me: “Wait, I know where I saw you!”
                Him: “Yeah, I was saying that I used to--…”
                Me: “You motherfucker, you used to give dope to kids to get them hooked on them, I saw you in DARE videos!”
                Him: “Dude…”
                Me: “Do you know I took that shit to heart?  I went to the dope dealers in my neighborhood and collected those free drugs.”
                Him: “Yo…”
                Me: “I wound up in rehab in 7th grade, motherfucker.  And I never smoked a PIECE of dope.”
                Him: “Look, I think you got it all--…”
                Me: “I should fuck you up right here, dude.”
                Him: “LISTEN!”
                Me: “No, YOU listen, gimme a reason motherfucker!”

At this point, we had the attention of basically everyone in earshot.  I am CONVINCED that this dude gave drugs to kids and led to the spiral that got me in all that trouble back at Lincoln Middle.

                Him: “Dude, you’re fucking crazy.”
                Me: “Crazy?!  Right now, I am pissed!”
                Him: “Yes, crazy, I am trying to tell you that I was--…”
                Me: “You were a got-damned dope man, the lowest of the scum of the earth!”
                Him: “Now look, am I am going to get a chance to talk this out, or are you going to keep yelling, because this is getting out of hand.”

It was too late by then, I was convinced that he was what I thought he was.  Given the trajectory of my life experience based on what was set forth by what he was (to me in this moment), he didn’t get to even START his next sentence before I rushed him.

                Right here in line in front of all of these people, I had gone into a red-misted rage and first hit him in the jaw, he started to fall and I tackled him.  I pinned his arms down with my knees and just kept punching him in the head and neck, I had to have hit him 10-15 times before security got involved and held us down until the cops arrived.  We were both arrested for fighting and statements taken from witnesses.  I was clearly the aggressor.  The guy, in his teenage years, was an actor who portrayed a drug dealer in videos for DARE and the ONDCP.  Not only was I the aggressor, I was also a damned idiot  Thank God that man was the forgiving type, he decided not to press charges.  I was held overnight and released in the morning and returned to work.

That was the SECOND time that fucking D.A.R.E. program had ruined my fucking life.


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