True Story©... PNC Politics

 

    "Not that this was necessarily what you asked, but yes in fact I have been thinking about this...

What if we have been doing this politics and leadership thing all wrong all along?

How, you ask?

Well what if there is such a marked haste to make every single-ass decision with minds unfortunately clouded by a complete refusal to hear and/or consider opposing views due to not approaching these discussions with anything even resembling clear-enough mind? What if maybe, just maybe, there was an idiot-proof and evidence-shown means to approach each and every single decision with the clearest mind possible and the movers and shakers who make all the decisions have just been ignoring it?

    Think about it...

This lil shutdown kerfuffle? Over before it starts!

Wars, conflicts or even RUMORS of such? No such thing!

Budgeting and taxation questions? Damn near self-correcting!

People fighting in the Wal Mart parking lot over a spot in line on Black Friday?  Not if they prepared before leaving home!

    What is this inexplicable and possibly-magical means to cure all that is clearly currently ailing Washington and politics in general?

It's Post Nut Clarity™!!!

    Imagine you're on the senate floor--...

Wait...

Upon swearing into the House and Senate, each elected official has a personal and VERY private Bastermation Room© installed nearby to their quarters. It would be out of the view of any cameras, sound-proofed and frequently disinfected. Stocked with whatever it takes to get them going.

... now imagine you're on the senate floor.  The argument over whether or not to push through some wasteful bill and whether or not the waste is actually beneficial to all Americans equally (note: it doesn't) and the debate invariably devolves into shouting matches and insults, like it always does. 

The leader gavels a recess: 'THIRTY MINUTES, EVERYONE GOES AND CLEARS THEIR HEADS' and Lindsey Graham goes and watches the BBC Cuck pieces that George Santos put him onto, Mitch McConnell watches videos of single mothers being evicted on Christmas morning and doesn't even care if they're AI.  JD Vance's room just has a couch in it, while AOC finds some weird Christopher Columbus shaming Subreddit -- again, whatever gets everyone's juices flowing --  and they all convene back in chamber after thirty minutes.  To be totally honest, they will be out of the view of the cameras, so no one is saying that they even have to go into the room alone if we're being honest!  Now back in session with clear minds following a smattering of some good ol' Post-Nut Clarity, they can come together and make some decisions that work for the people and perhaps tone down some of the hate that has come to permeate the populace.

Hopefully everyone will have washed their hands when they return to chambers.

    Once back in session everyone can convene with an absolutely clear mind, unclouded by whatever was backing them up before they had the opportunity to get that off -- pun intended.

That's a thing called 'Post Nut Clarity' and it is literally the unexplainable phenomena that could cure all that ails the entire world, if only we would just apply it correctly.  If it is on Wikipedia then it is is ABSOLUTELY a real thing, by the way.

    Think about it... How much time, energy, expense and head/heartache could be saved if EVERY major decision was approached with even just a little bit of post-nut clarity?  Instead of arguing over literally anything, married couples could go upstairs and fuck it out then discuss whatever the issue was afterward and come to an amicable conclusion.  I'd be willing to bet divorce and single parenthood numbers would plummet in droves.

Street violence could be brought to an absolute end if people would just go back to the house for a few minutes and take care of business before coming (no pun intended) together in the streets to throw their life away.  See?  PNC just resolved the Chicago problem and the National Guard didn't have to get involved.

    I would go as far as to bet that if we could possibly get these adult content bans that are being rolled out lifted in these states in order to help in getting PNC adopted as a legitimate means of conflict resolution then I could f'sho get myself a Nobel Peace Prize and probably piss the president off a little bit.  But you know what?  With use of a little PNC himself, he could get the fuck over that too, it's kind of like a self-promoting solution!

    At the end of it all, though, nothing at all is absolutely fool-proof but we have already invested far too much time and effort into what has ultimately been a tragically losing position.  At what point do we all sit back and try something -- ANYTHING -- else, especially something that is otherwise harmless at least to attempt?

    I cannot say whether or not that anyone who can make the decisions around these parts to bring this to bear will listen to me, but I present these ideas as alternatives to get the people thinking.  Perhaps I should check into actually RUNNING for one of those positions of leadership, I got a year to make it happen.

So what about you...  Whaddya think?"

"Sir, what I said was 'if that will be all, please pull around for your total."

    I swear, I have GOT to stop going outside on the days that my intrusive thoughts are winning before I get myself into some real fuckin trouble out here.