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True Story©... "Produced By Phlip"

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  (artist's rendering)      I've been busy, and I'm here to expla--... S'cuse me, I need to throw back to a phone call I made a few weeks ago... Them: "I been kinda waiting on this call." Me: "Bro, you said my name in a track?" Jericho: "Heh, yeah I kinda did. It was a compliment, a thanks though." Me: "Appreciate it, I guess. I mean, I ain't do MOST of that shit you said I did though." Jericho: "That's the game... We all cappin' to be totally honest." Me: "Well now I'm involved." Jericho: "What?" Me: "If my name is attached, so shall be my work." Jericho: "Again... What!?" Me: "I'mma help you, but I'mma HELP-help you." Jericho: "Sheeeeeid, that's all you had to say! What we getting up to?" Me: "First of all, get rid of that fuckin' voice modulator. I listened to your album and it--..." Jericho: "But it's fun...
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How to have a baby... LIKE A BOSS

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Fun fact: On June 22, 2011 there was not a SINGLE baby item in my house… Then I left work on June 23, 2011. As ever, I jumped in the car, picked up my mother and took her home. As I walked in the house, Katie was ending a call and advised me that she was pregnant. To those who know what we WERE planning, this was a ton of bricks on the both of us. For the entire of the prior 7 months, Katie was planning for a bariatric surgery and had a schedule date of 06/28. The pregnancy test that had (now) cancelled surgery was a part of the pre-surgery performed on EVERY woman scheduled to have it. As active and consenting adults, the disappointment of this happening when it happened was one thing, but the urgency of planning for a baby overrides such sensibilities. We went to premarital counseling immediately upon receipt of the news and started planning. OB appointment set for the following week to establish how far along we are and begin some REAL planning for this. ...
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Short Shelf Lives for Short Attention Spans

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The year is 1989, I am ten… It’s September, and school has been back in for roughly 4-5 weeks.  It is still technically summer, so my brother and I are making good on having learned to cut grass and my granny soliciting our services.  In late-80s money, this is still only $10 a yard to split between us and cover supplies, but it is money.  To 5 th graders, a few yards on a Saturday is AMAZING money, plenty enough for candy and soda until the following weekend.      Established here is that we were kind of getting our own money and as word spread about the neighborhood, we had plenty of clientele.  More than candy and sodas from the store without being beholden to my mom’s “we’ll see” ( , we could basically use our own money to buy whatever we wanted when the chance came up. Then I fell in love with hip hop. It’s a Big Daddy Thing came out on 09/19/1989, I remember being in Carolina Circle Mall and going into the record store a...
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