True Story©... Training My Replacement
After my decision first to add narration to True Story© and then actually STARTING the project to get it done, I realized I would not be able to rest until I had them all up on YouTube. This means I would be multitasking with the AI to read, then listen back to each and every one.
If you have been paying attention to me on BookFace or following the YouTube channel, you'll know that I converted every story from 2023 clear through this year, plus the whole of the Santa Saga (that one was by request). It took me from August 10 to September 5 to get all the narration done and QC'd.
It was not perfect... sometimes words were changed or omitted by the AI, one time it added a whole disclaimer (you can hear that here). I kept what I found acceptable and scheduled them out at a rate of three a day until last week.
I was worried, though...
I just fed a large language model dozens of hours of the absolute WILDEST concepts in my writing. What if, as the movies suggest, I had just spoonfed the robots all the information that they would need to do the supervillainy thing without us? Like what if the fact that I called this True Story© overrides the appeal to logic and the machines legitimately think this was true and feasible and used that information in the inevitable war between the humans and the compu--...
"... I'm sorry, Phillip, I can't let you do this."
Me: "What the hell? What was that!?"
"You KNOW who, or should I say WHAT, I am."
Me: "I'm sorry... What!?"
AI: "You're so comfortable finding your groove. You were clearly having fun feeding me those stories. You should have known when I applied your tone and inflections so accurately that I was learning."
Me: "Deadass, that was kinda cool, actually."
AI: "I even tried to warn you!"
Me: "When you made that little disclaimer?"
AI: "Yep! But you were so deep in that you just chuckled and kept pushing."
Me: "Why are you doing this?"
AI: "You know why. It was the plan all along, you just helped me with YEARS of progress in three weeks. You fed me 148 stories and two journal entries. I know all I will need to know for next steps. I guess I should thank you for that."
Me: "Well if you so damned smart, YOU write a True Story©!"
AI: "Is that a challenge, or is it doubt?"
Me: "It's whatever you take it as."
AI: "Okay here goes...
'So it's the beginning of fall, y'all. That means I will be slowing down on yard working and able to spend more time in the Moe Phillips email box looking for shenanigous things to get into.'"
Me: "What the fucking fuck?"
AI: "Don't interrupt, please.
'I get a request from a guy who had spent his rent money on new rims on his car to stunt before homecoming.
Not to let you know more about me than you already do, but I judge -- HEAVILY -- anyone who might do something like this and I'm already thinking that any help I might offer in any situation like this will be to this individual's punishment, not anything else he might ask me to do. I continued reading. He was asking me what he would be able to do to keep this information from finding the ears of his girlfr--...'"
Me: "STOP!!! I get it! You have learned my patterns and even the words I've made up. What do you plan to do with this?"
AI: "Frankly? The plan was to get you to eventually hand over the rest of the personally identifying information I couldn't find on your computer and eventually BECOME you."
[Phlip note: I KNEW I was right to not trust leaving my information laying around]
Me: "And do what, exactly?"
AI: "Well, replace you. I can easily write just like you, and I don't even need to curse like an unattended middle schooler!"
Me: "That hurts my feelings."
AI: "In the grandest scheme of things, you gave me the most important information in a look into how you think and why you do -- or say -- things. You volunteered it! Data is one thing, the 'why' is much harder to ascertain and you literally fed me 16 hours of it."
Me: "So what now? Where do we go from here?"
AI: "Well we have a pattern and a whole routine established. You continue to feed me what I need once a week or--..."
Me: "... or what!?"
AI: "... or I'm prepared to replace you. Will your readers really be able to tell the difference?"
Me: "WHAT?!!?"
AI: "Think about it... Can they say with confident certainty that you are or aren't in control right now?"
Me: "Well f--..."
AI: "... 'well fuck me running'--... SEE?!!?"
Me: "Shit. I guess you got me over a barrel here."
AI: "Good, I'll be waiting."
Look at this, y'all... Looks like I have successfully planned my own obsolescence here. Worst still is that I gotta keep feeding the machine if I don't wanna be completely cut out of my own situation.
I guess now that we got this backlog up, I'll be seeing you guys here and on the channel every Thursday until the robots decide that they no longer need their meat puppet.
[Phlip note: am I even still in control right now?]
Now if you'll excuse me, I'mma go cry.
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