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True Story©... Shot Shootin'

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       He came back, y'all… "Who?" you ask?      Y'all remember back in October when we accidentally turned on the living room TV and I had to go downstairs to turn it off and found an intruder in my living room? This motherfucker had the brazen gall to come back to my house! [ Phlip Note : FWIW, with an update to the Fire TV app, they added a power button and now I can power the TV off from anywhere my wifi reaches ]      This time, though, he was here in the daytime. I'm in the front yard last Wednesday working on one of my signature double-pattern-triple-pass cuts when an old beat up car pulls into my driveway and parks right next to the yard. Apart from me looking at ANYONE who doesn't know me (and most people who DO, for what it matters) sideways when they park in my driveway instead of on the street, it should be noted that I tend to move all cars to the opposite side of the driveway so I can properly turn the mower ...
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Phlip and his camera - State Fair edition.

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State Fair has been on since the 10th, today was the last of it... We had been TRYING to get to it, but with rain the first weekend, chilly last weekend and full time employment keeping us away from it during the week, we had not made it yet. Kicked around the text messages and Facebook exchange between the Katie and I with my best friend and my sister's (as in "the best friend of my sister," I only have one and would NEVER pluralize with an apostrophe), we decided that this afternoon would be the time to make it happen. Woke up this morning and whipped up breakfast -- hash brown casserole with diced potatoes, onions, turkey sausage, eggs and cheese (I really should have blogged that one, it was early, sue me) -- then commenced to taking a nap and starving myself all damned day. I was gonna GET me a fuckin' turkey leg when I got to that damned fair. I have been so close to getting one and doing it the whole time it has been around. Anyways, we met Victoria and a coupl...
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Ghetto-ass names; they're my birth control

I work in a place where I have to actually talk to people from doctors' offices. Often times, I see or hear people with names that cause me to HONESTLY question: what the fuck their parents were thinking when they saddled them with it? if said parents were even a MOMENT over the age of 16 when they named them? are fathers REALLY so pretentious as to need to name their DAUGHTERS after themselves? Enlisting the assistance of The Katie in the name of collection of the names as presented, as well as offering up a few of her own, I have compiled here a list of some of the most egregious of the names I have since come across... If you happen upon this list and find your name, don't take it personally... If you happen upon this list and you see the name of YOUR child, TAKE IT PERSONALLY and apologize to your children as soon as possible. If you've bestowed one of these names upon an as-yet unborn child, please rethink your strategy, use a different and STILL apologize to your chi...
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