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True Story©... Holiday Conundrum Pt II - The Conclusion

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  [ Phlip note : if you weren't here last week, please start there before continuing ] Welcome back... Me: "'Fuck you mean *I* gotta fix the future of Christmas!?" Santa: "You're the one who told me to go and get these Big Dick--..." Me: "... no--..." Santa: "Dig Bick Throbbers. You talked me into going to get these things. Now they're clearly sending my elves into cardiac trauma and it is up to you to fix it." Me: "Have you considered taking away their narcotics, and maybe -- I'ono -- SOLVE the problem?" Santa: "It's too late for that now!" Me: "Dude, you said you could get through Christmas '25 and the real issue is down the road. That means you have--..." Santa: "... WE!!!" Me: "YOU have time. I work an office job and do landscaping. You're Santa fuckin Claus, the one with the magic and shit. Remember that wild ass- bag of coal you gave me that time?" Santa: ...
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True Story©… Workin' Sex

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        In approximately 53 days I will have been working from the comfort of my home for three years…   While home, I have access to the whole of the internet on my phone and/or personal laptop right here next to the work PC without the constraints placed on by my employer.   That means that no one will question what is on my screen on Twitter, Reddit or whatever social media app I may so happen to have open at any given time.      The funny thing about the Twitter algorithm is that it seems to suggest similarities to things you may have posted, followed or liked, no matter how long ago that may have been.   That said, I get a lot of suggestions about hip hop, politics and titties. Today, we will talk a subject adjacent that last one…      Something I have noticed, especially in my perusal of Reddit and Twitter and through unsolicited contacts on Instagram, is that these Covid years have created a new clas...
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True Story©... A Holiday Conundrum

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  I was off work on Tuesday...      I LITERALLY spent the day on the couch, complaining about the fact that nothing comes on television that interests me in the daytime until I eventually just dozed the hell off. Well, almost literally... I had an appointment in the morning and had to step out into the abusive cold for a couple of hours, but then I was home on the couch bitching about television as I described above...      While teetering between napping and wondering how the hell Pat McAfee can get away with cussing on television at noon, even on cable, I would have SWORN I heard the "chingchingching" sound we've been conditioned to think of when we think of Santa on his sleigh. "I'm trippin, lemme get this little nap in and I got some straightening up to do before anyone gets home" was the first thought in my head and closed my eyes back.      It should be noted that in this house I actually do have a chimney and a fireplace unlike...
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