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True Story©... The Ride

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       I am an awful liar… I don't mean that as in "I'm awful because I lie a lot," I mean it as in "I am awful at lying" .  Yes, there is absolutely a difference      I tell the band kids all the time to just be straight up with shit, because maintaining a lie is not e'em worth it in the grandest scheme of things.  Something I learned when I was drinking is -- outside of WILDLY entertaining stories -- how hard it is to remember all of the elements of a non-truth when the truth is what actually happened.  You ain't gotta work to remember shit if you stick to what actually happened in the first place. … unless, of course, you can convince yourself that the lie you're telling is the actual truth, in which case congratulations you're a fucking sociopath and master manipulator.      Anyway… I'm just getting off work a couple weeks ago and had to go scout a couple of lawns I cut, plus run quotes on two new ones.  I'm not ...
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True Story©... And your damned hashtags

True Story©…                 My level of disdain for people who fake wittiness is beyond measure.  Also, sometimes I have a hard time maintaining my temper in response to such things.  With that in mind, I fucking HATE hashtags for the sake of hashtagging.  I understand the use of them for discussions on a topic on social media, like last night’s debate or MLB playoffs games.  But cramming a sentence preceded by a pound sign under a post with no spacing because you thought it was witty is enough to send me into a rage.  Seeing them on an email, text message or even a fucking t-shirt makes it even worse still.                 One day last year, I decided that I’d had enough after a rough morning on The BookFace.  I was off work and home, and several consecutive posts contained the worthless hashtagging s...
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Phlip - 1, Black Friday - 0

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            So it’s 4:30pm on Black Friday.  I had successfully managed to not have to leave my house to do anything other than pay a couple of bills as I might do on any payday Friday I should so happen to not have to work.  Hell, it is what I would do if I HAD to work.  Stops also include also payday standards Food Lion and ABC (grocery and liquor for those who don’t live here) for the items I would normally acquire to get me through a weekend.             As my child is still only one year and four months old, she does not yet have the tastes that even MIGHT require that I stand out in the ball-chillingly 25º morning before a store opened to buy her anything.  Responsible adulthood has unlearned me the habit of really wanting many things for myself that aren’t directly tied to the experiences of holding down my house for Ava and my wife.  About noon, coming in f...
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