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How to have a baby... LIKE A BOSS

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Fun fact: On June 22, 2011 there was not a SINGLE baby item in my house… Then I left work on June 23, 2011. As ever, I jumped in the car, picked up my mother and took her home. As I walked in the house, Katie was ending a call and advised me that she was pregnant. To those who know what we WERE planning, this was a ton of bricks on the both of us. For the entire of the prior 7 months, Katie was planning for a bariatric surgery and had a schedule date of 06/28. The pregnancy test that had (now) cancelled surgery was a part of the pre-surgery performed on EVERY woman scheduled to have it. As active and consenting adults, the disappointment of this happening when it happened was one thing, but the urgency of planning for a baby overrides such sensibilities. We went to premarital counseling immediately upon receipt of the news and started planning. OB appointment set for the following week to establish how far along we are and begin some REAL planning for this. ...
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Maybe I am different or something?

The number of people I contact on the daily from different regions of the country/world is enormous. What kills me, though, is the rules to this language we speak that seem to be lost even on people who have grown up speaking/typing/writing it. It really is sad. Say it with me, people. "Conversate" is NOT a word... ANY time you feel so inclined as to use it when speaking, STOP without including that "-ate" suffix and no one in the room worth their salt will look at you like a retard. "Irregardless ," is ALSO not a word... Omit the "-ir" prefix and you've successfully avoided the use or a word that renders itself a double negative. "Then " - this word is to indicate that something took place at a particular place in time, either to describe something that has happened ("back then") or immediately/soon following ("she swung on me, and then I punched her ass out"). "Than" - "as opposed to," or...
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The fine and underpracticed art of shutting up

I'm 30 years old and went to public schools my entire edumacational life, even higher edumacation. Sure, the elbows I may have rubbed with may not be of the academy available to those with larger capital means, but I seem to find myself drawn to smart people -- it is one of the things that has driven my attraction to certain types of womenfolks. This has often required that I be outside of my normal surroundings in order to be engaged in conversations about more than just pop fucking culture or the likes. No one wants to know what the criminally overrated Angelina Jolie had for breakfast on her way to adopt another brown baby. Needless to say, I have seen and experienced my fair share of both ig'nant and intellectual discourse. My ability to bridge the gap leads my good friend Phillip to jokingly refer to me as the "smartest ig'nant n**ga you'll ever meet." One thing I have noticed, though is that with conversation, ANY discourse -- be it a general round-table...
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