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True Story©... Reinvention

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       Where these motherfuckers be getting my number from? I mean with this one, we knew he had my number but I still don't have a damned clue where he got it from. That's right, my phone rang... Me: "Hello?" Caller: "Okay, so you were right." Me: "About what? Whodis?" Caller: "About selling t-shirts not being worth it  That shit was a WHOLE mess." Me: "Jigga--... Y'know what?  I'm not gon' pile on today... Jericho Jackson!" Jericho: "Yeah man..." Me: "So you going to the welding program to get your certificate?" Jericho: "Dafuq? Hell no! I'm going back to rapping!" Me: "Bro, it's been TWO WEEKS!" Jericho: "I know man, but I made sense of the math you gave me and said 'fuck that'." "Me: "Smart...  But also, your raps were ass!" Jericho: "No, my CONCEPT was ass. I'm getting off the Jiggaboo Jackson thing, I told you tha...
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Ghetto-ass names; they're my birth control

I work in a place where I have to actually talk to people from doctors' offices. Often times, I see or hear people with names that cause me to HONESTLY question: what the fuck their parents were thinking when they saddled them with it? if said parents were even a MOMENT over the age of 16 when they named them? are fathers REALLY so pretentious as to need to name their DAUGHTERS after themselves? Enlisting the assistance of The Katie in the name of collection of the names as presented, as well as offering up a few of her own, I have compiled here a list of some of the most egregious of the names I have since come across... If you happen upon this list and find your name, don't take it personally... If you happen upon this list and you see the name of YOUR child, TAKE IT PERSONALLY and apologize to your children as soon as possible. If you've bestowed one of these names upon an as-yet unborn child, please rethink your strategy, use a different and STILL apologize to your chi...
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2007 - the year being a hip hop fan became HARD work

How does that saying go about doing the same shit and expecting different results? Well, I am about to run down 2007 in hip hop, and I am less than thrilled at the prospect that it will be any better than 2006 was before it. Again, I am with the same feeling coming in that I do not specifically recall any huge hits coming into the year. Somehow, that worries the shit out of me. There was not much special in my personal life to mark the releases of this year, at least not that I can recall. "Turning 28" is not one of those things one sits and expounds on the virtues of, much like the letter 'c'. All that being said, why don't I just get on into it? January Ultramagnetic MCs start us off with The Best Kept Secret , which I merely downloaded for the sake of history. Same applies for X-Clan's Return From Mecca , the difference being that Ultramagnetic is still on my hard drive. The savior of this month, however was Sean Price's Jesus Price Superstar . [ Phlip ...
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