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Ghetto-ass names; they're my birth control

I work in a place where I have to actually talk to people from doctors' offices. Often times, I see or hear people with names that cause me to HONESTLY question: what the fuck their parents were thinking when they saddled them with it? if said parents were even a MOMENT over the age of 16 when they named them? are fathers REALLY so pretentious as to need to name their DAUGHTERS after themselves? Enlisting the assistance of The Katie in the name of collection of the names as presented, as well as offering up a few of her own, I have compiled here a list of some of the most egregious of the names I have since come across... If you happen upon this list and find your name, don't take it personally... If you happen upon this list and you see the name of YOUR child, TAKE IT PERSONALLY and apologize to your children as soon as possible. If you've bestowed one of these names upon an as-yet unborn child, please rethink your strategy, use a different and STILL apologize to your chi...
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True Story©… The Death of the Party

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       Sometimes all it takes to ruin a situation is the situation itself…      We have been in this house for almost 17 months now.  I am a decent neighbor; I KEEP the grass cut, my dogs don’t run loose in the neighborhood, I pull my trash cans up from the street as soon as they have been collected and I don’t shoot in the air on holidays. … but I don’t particularly like people, so the BEST neighborly thing I do is minding my own fucking business and leaving people alone.      My wife, on the other hand, is a peopler and has a gregariousness that would cause me to cower into my mancave and lock the door. Compromise: when she decides to entertain, I will make sure the house is clean while I agree to be at least cordial and attempt to refrain from cursing around children.  No promises on that last one.      In that we are now in a neighborhood of people around our age who have children aroun...
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LeBron, enjoy that vacation

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Why does it feel like we've been here before? Wait, it is more than likely because we have . My last posts on basketball (2 links, that) were rife with concern that Cleveland SHOULD be a problem for anyone they meet. In so many words, I had conceded to the inevitability of this being their championship season. Man, am I EVER glad I was wrong. Look, I know it seems like I am hating on the boy, and to that I will admit, fuck it. What bothers me not is the amount of times he gives, through his actions, REASONS to be hated on. No one remembers how he reacted to being blown off the court in his first finals, as no one expected them to be there, even themselves so their sweep was not even a small surprise. We ALL remember his walking off of the court without even congratulating his "friend" Dwight Howard, then offering the excuse... “It’s not being a poor sport or anything like that...If somebody beats you up, you’re not going to congratulate them,” James said. “It doesn’t ...
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