Halle Berry!!!

You know what?

I know and readily concede that she is fucking gorgeous. I know this because she is ALWAYS nothing short of third when the conversation between the fellas turns to "aye man, would you f*ck around on your girl/wife with..." subjects. It is what it is.
I know that she is 43 years old and now pregnant with the second child, and I would not be able to blame old dude she is currently with if the kids were born through means other than artificial insemination. I mean, I ain't one to judge but if a dude can't pop a rod to impregnate Halle Berry, all signs point to zesty in that dude. It points to a sad state of affairs in the world we live in when Halle Berry, the worldwide benchmark for beauty when ethnicity is removed from the discussion, is serving as some guy's "beard," and I mean that.

Back to the task at hand...
It would take a man of extreme abilities, game, looks or stupidity to CHEAT on a woman like that. That is, unless this woman is absolutely FUCKED UP on some other plane of her existence. I mean, what is there to gain from fucking around on the finest fucking woman on the planet, unless it is because she drove you to it?

I enter into the discussion a certain David Christopher Justice, who was at the time employed by the Atlanta Braves. One might want to understand that the ONLY sports money in the United States coming close to movie money is Baseball money, but expounding on such would be me digressing, so I will not go in on it.
The allegations were that someone could not maintain a life with only inserting his winky in women named Maria Halle Berry, and that the pressure of a 182-game baseball season -- half of which is spent on the road -- added to a movie schedule that might see HER somewhere else, perhaps as far away as another country, led to irreconcilable differences which caused an ultimate split.

Following that, we find the subject of my words here attached to Eric Benét Jordan, who I MIGHT be inclined to say caught her on the rebound, but it had been 4 years and one suicide attempt (more on this later, maybe) in the in-between time. During this time, Benét would come describable as a sex addict, one who could not separate himself from "new pussy," but as a connoisseur of new pussy in a past life, I will PERSONALLY state that when you have the individual accepted as the finest woman in the world in your stable, she is the ONLY one in the stable, even if you're not in love -- the other reason you swear off new pussy...
... or you're a motherfucking idiot.
... or one other issue to come in a bit...

Here at this point, we're up to, um... 2004, 2005? and we have the finest broad on the planet coming out of TWO failed marriages where she was cheated on, and claiming that she was a victim of domestic violence, while maintaining a strange lack of specificity or presented charges as to WHO it was that went upside her head.
Call me strange if you choose, but I find THAT set of statistics to be a bit odd...

Anyway,
Fool me once, shame on you... Fool me twice, shame on me.
The field is FURTHER skewed in my favor if I happen to be at the very top of what I am and can use such to my advantage, but fail to do so.
Again, I have a philanderous past, so I fully understand the mind of an individual who may go outside looking for something, but I ALSO understand that you do NOT leave the Filet Mignon at home to go get Steak-Ums...
We have Halle Berry, who has been married twice, both failed and one (or both) involving her getting her face chipped, then getting into a relationship where they employ silly wording to avoid exchanging vows and last names, but aren't even going through the FUN part of making babies, skipping right to the pain and expensive parts?

Riiiiiight.
Halle Berry is nuttier than squirrel shit.

THAT is why she has had more than one failed marriage...
That is why she lies to us about her happiness level of late.
THAT is why she made Catwoman. (wait, I never saw that movie, never will)


Hurricane Chris can KEEP Halle Berry.