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True Story©... That ol' Biological Clock

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  "Moe, I don't know that this is your wheelhouse, but I'm running low on options now... My wife and I have been married for two and a half years now, and are having a bit of a problem. We're wholly on the same page as far as family goals, i.e. we definitely want children while we're still young enough to enjoy it and have been trying, but we've had trouble conceiving. After months of trying, we saw a doctor and she was diagnosed with a condition that will make conception difficult, and even if successful may not see all the way to birth. We were heartbroken, but not near as much as we would be when we learned the COST of adoption with mind on our preference for a newborn or the non-insurance-covered cost of surrogacy. What we seek from you is advice on how we might be able to proceed in starting our family? We want a newborn, would love to involve our own progeny if at all possible and for it to not break the bank. Please help!"      What I have not tol...
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In the Kitchen with Phlip -- BAWLS!

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Meatballs, that is. Warning, there might be gratuitous innuendousness in this post. Every Tuesday for the past 5 (going on 6) weeks now, I have made meatballs from ground chicken/turkey sausage.  These were the ones I made two weeks ago.  Each time I have come up with a different sauce to cook them in, only once has that sauce been a standard red spaghetti sauce. Ground Chicken/turkey meatballs in a cheese sauce Cast of characters: Cream of Chicken and Cheddar Cheese soups, cheese of your choice and chicken broth Diced peppers/onions One pound of ground chicken, one pound of turkey sausage, you can use beef and pork if you eat those.  I do not And dice up some turkey bacon in your chopper (optional).  Naturally, you can use regular bacon if you eat red meat Toss in the pepper mixture... ... and some bread crumbs grate a little of that Gouda you had in the fridge and need to use (optional) Two eggs (or one egg for every pound of meat) g...
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True Story©... Crashout Assistance

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"Bro I'm finna crash the fuck out and need you to talk me down." So we just all gas and no brakes here on this fine afternoon, huh. Me: "First of all, why the fuck you at my house at noon on a Tuesday?" Homie: "I told you, I'm about to crash out on this b--..." Me: "Crash out on WHO!? And for what?" Homie: "My wife, man... You know when I work from home, everyone in the house knows to leave me alone in the basement unless I come upstairs. I come up on a break and find a positive pregnancy test in the upstairs bathroom." Me: "Congratulations, my G." Homie: "I had a vasectomy in 2023." Me: "Valid crashout, lemme get my shoes and we'll ride out." Homie: "That's what I needed to hear."      Damn, it is Tuesday in frigid-ass fuckin January and Phillip has to go out and do Moe Phillips shit on my homie's wife without a plan. This is gonna be good. I tossed on some shoes, grabbed m...
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