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Ghetto-ass names; they're my birth control

I work in a place where I have to actually talk to people from doctors' offices. Often times, I see or hear people with names that cause me to HONESTLY question: what the fuck their parents were thinking when they saddled them with it? if said parents were even a MOMENT over the age of 16 when they named them? are fathers REALLY so pretentious as to need to name their DAUGHTERS after themselves? Enlisting the assistance of The Katie in the name of collection of the names as presented, as well as offering up a few of her own, I have compiled here a list of some of the most egregious of the names I have since come across... If you happen upon this list and find your name, don't take it personally... If you happen upon this list and you see the name of YOUR child, TAKE IT PERSONALLY and apologize to your children as soon as possible. If you've bestowed one of these names upon an as-yet unborn child, please rethink your strategy, use a different and STILL apologize to your chi...
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True Story©... The Ride

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       I am an awful liar… I don't mean that as in "I'm awful because I lie a lot," I mean it as in "I am awful at lying" .  Yes, there is absolutely a difference      I tell the band kids all the time to just be straight up with shit, because maintaining a lie is not e'em worth it in the grandest scheme of things.  Something I learned when I was drinking is -- outside of WILDLY entertaining stories -- how hard it is to remember all of the elements of a non-truth when the truth is what actually happened.  You ain't gotta work to remember shit if you stick to what actually happened in the first place. … unless, of course, you can convince yourself that the lie you're telling is the actual truth, in which case congratulations you're a fucking sociopath and master manipulator.      Anyway… I'm just getting off work a couple weeks ago and had to go scout a couple of lawns I cut, plus run quotes on two new ones.  I'm not ...
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Slaughterhouse - "Slaughterhouse"

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Here we find Royce Da 5'9", Joe Budden, Joell Ortiz and Crooked I, 4 rappers from four places... No, fuck that, you can Google the story. All the 3 of you need to know is that when I found THE internet, Eminem's first album was coming out and Royce was on the best song album (in my opinion, of course) and when I got HIGH SPEED internet, I was getting Clue CDs for free and Joe Budden was TEARING THEM DOWN. Furthering of connoisseur (yes, that is spelled right) comes from my years at this shit, see my summary of the 90s last week in this very blog if you doubt me. I was never into Crooked I, and only within the last 6 months began to feel Joell Ortiz, but the fact remains that I respect the work of all 4 involved parties PRIOR to this project, especially Budden and Royce. Ignoring the paths of Crooked I and Joell Ortiz, who would flounder on Death Row Records and Aftermath respectively, I STAYED in my fanship of Joey and Royce in the in between, as far as to feel just a litt...
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