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True Story©... Break A Wish Foundation

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     I've been away for a few weeks. No it was not planned. No I will not be explaining publicly, if you know you know.      While on the shelf, I had a lot of time to think about my next moves. I mean, I was only off work one week, plus one day each for the holidays, but this also coincides with the slow season at work so yeah... a lot of time. Sometimes during the day, I'll have the TV on ESPN for noise until "noise" includes a certain blowhard whose name I will not--... Screamin' A Smith. I change the channel when I hear his voice. Anyway... ESPN. They partner with the Make-A-Wish Foundation and apparently John Cena to make sick kids dreams come true and then put it on TV to let sponsors and advertisers foot the bill while they write it off on their own taxes. Wild, but wholly American.      So I has this idea... If you think I'mma fake an illness or borrow a kid to fake an illness in order to get a chance to be in the same room a...
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True Story©... Stress Test

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       Weird things happening nowadays... One would think that I am NOT the one to be asking for serious advice, especially after reading the shenanigous outcomes I tend to prefer. Despite that, here we are. I've been busy with yard work and Tiny Little™ , so "outside" is not something I've particularly been able to participate in, so while she was napping, I opened up the good ol email. "Moe, I'm considering marrying my girlfriend but as much as I love her, I'm still not comfortable that she is the one. Is there anything I could do to know for sure before throwing years of my life away to a poor decision?"      Now... Pragmatically thinking, I would explain to him that if he gotta ASK then he already knows he probably don't trust her and should not move forward. But if I answered with just that, this story would end with the period at the end of this sentence. Instead, I responded and asked for his phone number to ask some more detailed questi...
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True Story©... Home Alone

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  Wife Person™ has a best friend...      Well she has about four, but one in particular sits at the absolute top of the pot and that is the one she doesn't get to see as much as they might like due to physical distance. They only get to see each other in person about once or twice a year and it always involves an airline ride. They get to see each other this weekend, but I never keyed y'all in on what happened when Wife Person™ went to TN/AR to visit her back in the spring.      It was March, they'd planned the visit for months in advance. It was planned for a week/end that I would be otherwise untethered to anything other than my lawn mower... Me: "But who gon feed me and remind me to take care of the dogs?" Wife Person™: "You do most of the cooking, cleaning and dog-rearing already. The fuck!?" Me: "And no adult supervision?" Wife Person™: "You talked to your therapist on Tuesday, right?" Me: "Of course!" Wife Person™...
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